This last couple months has been less than great. So much has happened that has given me reason to question when society THINKS I am an adult.
So I pose the question; when is a person considered an adult?
Is it when you turn 18?
Is it when you go to college?
Is it when you live on your own and pay your own bills?
Is it when you have a degree?
Is it when you get married?
Is it when you live so many miles from home?
Or finally is it when you have your own children?
I am not sure which of these are correct if any...
Let me plead my case, I am 25, went to college and received two degrees and lived away from home and payed my own bills. I was married at 22 and we own our own home. So did I pass?
My brother recently told me that I am not an adult, his argument well is that since I live in the same town as my parents I am not an adult. He just got done with four years in Japan. He is 23 and well still acts immature, he is very stubborn about even trying to understand the religion that CJ and I have chosen to live our life by, he has decided that living in PV well isn't where we should be since our parents live here. So he has decided he is the adult and we are not yet. Is he an adult?
My step sister is 22 and is pregnant with a little boy. She has some college under her belt and lives with her 21 yr old boyfriend. She has never said anything to ever effect my not being an adult, but my step mother and my dad are treating her as though she is an adult. This may just be my ranting and my strong beliefs, but it hurts to see this.
I rant about being an adult and well just because I say I am an adult does it mean I am. What do I need to do to help make my parents understand that their adult children are tired of being treated like they are 12 years old? What can I do to make me feel like I have been doing what is right for me and my husband?
I am growing impatient as I stay here and get treated as a child, I hope that moving across country from our parents will then remind them that we are old enough to make the decisions that are appropriate for my family and not be second guessed by everyone!
4 comments:
Sweet Nikki! I believe 100% you are an adult. But I would like to add something that you dabbled a bit on. You and CJ are something that your brother and sister are not... Very Responsible. I think they are adults, but from the sounds of it, not acting like it. You just stand out against them, and instead of thinking of that as a negative thing, think of it more positively. You will learn more responsibility as you venture out elsewhere, but I lived near my folks and in laws for 3 1/2 years and we proved that that doesn't make one any less of an adult. Sorry to hear that others feel you don't "measure up" but you should know that you are much better in your position than they are and maybe they are trying to make you feel inferior due to their own insecurities. (That's what my inlaws do... when it stopped working, they stopped bothering us) Good luck this coming month. Call me or email me anytime you need someone to talk to :-)
Sweet Nikki, you are experiencing trials in your life that most "adults" will never face...and because of it you are a better, more caring and more responsible adult. Like you friend said, your family is belittling you to rectify their own doubts and insecurities. Don't let it get to you, you hold your head up high and know that your following the right path...the straight and narrow one...and you just keep being the sweetness that you are. You deserve only happiness.
Now you know why I loved living in Arizona so very much! *GRINS* Trust me, it was the best thing I think I ever did. Huzzah for the USMC stationing us there.
Enjoy your similar move East. *GRINS*
And for the record? I think you are obviously more mature then certain people and most definitely an adult. :)
Lots of love!
Sister Nikki,
I have often thougt about being an adult. And honestly, I'm quite terrified. I think that the word, "adult" is more along the lines of your body is mature. But, the word "wise", I don't think should be associated with the word "adult." As I grow and see my adulthood swiftly aproaching, I'm reminded that Someone asked be to be like a child. Submissive, meek, humble, patient, full of love. I love children, they say things that confound even the most learned scholars. As I make desicions in my life, I turn to my Heavenly Father's guidence, support, peace, and everlasting Love. Just as my phisical body grows to adulthood, I hope that my spiritual body may grow closer, and my faith may increase, as I listen to my Heavenly Parents and Become more like a child. Trusting. Everything will be ok. In Micah 7 verse 8 it says, "Rejoice not against me O mine enemy, when I fall I shall rise, when I sit in darkness my Lord will be a light unto me." When you feel like life is slipping through your fingers, tie a knot and hang on. (Ensign August2010) "Lord God, behold, I cannot speak: for I am a child. But the Lord said unto me, Say not, I am a child, for thou shalt go to all that I shall send thee, and what soever I command thee thou shalt speak. Be not afraid of their faces, for I am with thee..." (Jeremiah 1:6-8) "Trust in the Lord, and lean not to thine own understanding" (Provebs 3:5) "For I...knew that God could not lie." (Enos 1:6) "Know ye not that ye are in the hands of God?" (Mormon 5:23)
I love you! Your are an amazing, beautiful, daughter of God, and I hope to be with you throughout the eternities.
3rd Nephi 13: 32-34
Doctrine and Covenants 122:7-9
Post a Comment